What It Takes To Be VIBRANT with Donna Tashjian

Dawn Damon: My guest today is an author, podcast host, life mastery coach, minister, and the visionary founder of Vibrant Living International. She's the creator of the Spiritual Intelligence Method, and she has 30 years of experience transforming lives, guiding people toward abundance, balance, and thriving relationships, and we need that. She's known as the truth exposer and the fear buster. Please welcome my guest today, Donna Tashgen.

Hi Donna, how are you today?

Donna Tashjian: I am doing fabulous, Dawn. It is a pleasure to chat with you today, and I'm looking forward to it.

Dawn Damon: Thank you so much for coming on.

I want to know more in a moment about this truth, exposure, and fear buster that you're known as you do host a podcast called The Vibrant Living Podcast. I'm really curious about what it means to live vibrantly.

Donna Tashjian: It means to live authentic and audacious. Filled with joy and purpose. It's different for everyone what that means, so wake up every day and say it's a brand new day. I can't wait. And there's been a lot of periods in my life where that wasn't the case.

Dawn Damon: Yeah, well, I want to hear about that and get into that because can we just wake up every morning and feel joyful? What if circumstances are gloomy? And what if the sun's not out? And what if we had a really rough night? Can we capture this vibrancy that you're talking about? Or is it something we have to cultivate? Tell us.

Donna Tashjian: Absolutely. You can definitely cultivate it. You can definitely live in it when you understand that joy and purpose and vibrancy and authenticity and audacity aren't dependent upon circumstances. And when we look at our circumstances, instead of looking inside or looking to God, we begin to be. Like a ship without a sail, tossed and turned by the waves of life that can happen. But that's one of the reasons why I developed the Spiritual Intelligence Method: to help people to live with their anchor steady, no matter what the winds may blow.

Dawn Damon: I want to hear about that spiritual intelligence method that you share, but I agree with you. Like I often say, you can have a circumstance, or you can have a stance.

A circumstance is that you're blown here and there by everything, but a stance says, yes, all of this is going on around me, but I choose to be firmly planted like that tree by the river of living water and say, this too will pass, I'll be stronger, I'll gain information, wisdom, experience, I choose to reframe this. So that's what you're talking about, right?

Donna Tashjian: Making those powerful choices. It isn't necessarily that we're always. But when we choose and we live with intention, then we find ourselves being able to walk in victory and joy, right?

One of the biggest keys to spiritual intelligence is being led by our spirit. And in my emotions may not align at the moment with I know that God's got me and then it's going to be okay. But, you know, something big just happened, and my emotions are reacting and understanding that. My emotions don't make it true. It's just how I'm feeling at the moment. Allow the feelings. But, you know, I've often said that just because I'm crying doesn't mean I'm not okay. It is just that the emotions have to be released at some point. Emotions are part of who we are, but it doesn't have to be our guiding force.

Dawn Damon: Yeah, I love that. Just because I'm crying doesn't mean I'm not okay. I'm releasing emotion, and emotion is part of the human experience.

You said that we are being led by our spirit, but what does that mean? I believe that I know, but maybe for the person who doesn't like, I believe we're made in the image of God and that makes us three parts. So we're body and we're soul and we're spirit. And our body is, you know, instant gratification, feed me, feed me, feed me, take care of me, nurture me. Our soul is kind of our mind and our will and our emotions. Then, our spirit is that part of us that is connected with God, and that is the truest part of us. That's the eternal part of us, right? So when you say led by the spirit, what does that mean?

Donna Tashjian: I began to be on a quest decades ago at this point coming from the scripture that's the initial one that started it anyway is in second Corinthians and it says the things that are unseen are eternal, but the things that are seen are temporary. And if you look at most of our Bible teachings, even our songs that we sing in church, they're all about coping. I'm gonna make it through, or whatever, and it's all about the circumstances. And if you think about us as children, most of the time we are, you know, all of our five senses are what we are led by.

Kids have a wonderful gift of imagination that we tend to lose. As we get into school, and if you think about it, as adults, we use our imagination more not to dream but to terrorize ourselves. Yes. It's all the stuff that could go wrong. It's all the things that probably will never happen, but if I think about it and prepare for it, maybe I'll be ready if the worst case scenario. And if you had any trauma, you do this even more.

Dawn Damon: That's so true. Oh, my goodness.

Donna Tasjan: We catastrophize. You wait for the other shoe to drop, you know, if it's good. Oh, it's been good. I wonder what's going to happen. There's this, we may not, we sometimes we've said it out loud, but we may think it. And so all of that is being led by circumstances. It's being led by past experiences, and my past doesn't determine my future unless I let it, and so learning to be able to live imagination again is a really key.

To being living by the spirit is because, so God says, I'm wonderfully made. I am anointed. I am called to do whatever. There's a whole lot listed, but each individual is called to do things. So what if I sit and imagine that that was so? Yes. So I am beautiful. I carry myself differently.

Dawn Damon: Yes.

Donna Tashjian: Everybody loves me instead of everybody hates me.

Dawn Damon: That's such a good one, right? You know, what else is like, I'm confident instead of fearful. Okay. So those are all the things God's given me a sound mind. And so, if that's true, what would that be like? And how would we show up if we believe those things?

Donna Tashjian: And first, we have to sit and even imagine that it could be true because it's felt so far from the truth. At times in our life, and so if you're having fear-filled thoughts, so if I had a sound mind and I was full of confidence, how would I feel? Do that first. That is meditating on God's word in a way we're not always taught. But how would it feel? How would I show up at whatever event, the board meeting, the office party, the whatever? If I knew I was beautiful, I knew everybody loved me, how would I show up?

Dawn Damon: Yes.

Donna Tashjian: Confident and radiant and ready for opportunity. Smiling and waiting to talk to people instead of going, Oh man, when is this going to be over.

Dawn Damon: Yeah.

Donna Tashjian: I've done that. And so I began to imagine what God has said about me. What is truth, actually? My past doesn't determine truth. It's just what happened. I know you know this. What happened to me doesn't define me.

Dawn Damon: Yes. Right.

Donna Tashjian: So that is one of the keys to beginning to develop spiritual intelligence. It's beginning to give what's unseen yet, calling those things that be not as though they are. Then begin to show up that way to the capability that you have at the moment. But the more you meditate, the more you ponder, the more you chew over, and the more you see on the inside, because we see on the inside. We don't really see with our eyes. We see from our spirit. We see from the inside, whether that's a good place or the fear place. So learning that is the beginning of developing your spiritual intelligence is even discovering what the truth is. What is that? And what would that be like?

Dawn Damon: Yes, it does. It makes such great sense. I'm thinking as you're talking, you know, I have some clients that I will be working with, and they'll say, but that's just saying that I'm happy when I'm really not. I have to tell the truth. I'm in discouragement. I'm in depression. Nobody likes me. These people left me. And I tell them, actually, it is working. You're just getting more of what you're seeing, what you're believing, and what you're claiming.

So when you sit down and say, wait a minute, let me visualize something else that is invisible. I don't see it here yet. But I believe what God's word says; let me picture that and see that and envision myself being victorious and open doors for me. That's living by faith, right? It's aligning with God.

Donna Tashjian: Well, faith, it doesn't take faith to say I'm depressed and people have been mean to me. It doesn't take faith to say that.

Dawn Damon: It's reporting.

Donna Tashjian: It's just reporting what has happened. But if I want more of what has happened, I keep saying what's happened. I mean, it is all through the Bible. Call those things that be not as though they are. Because the things that are unseen are eternal. Yes. And just because you can't touch it and see it, it doesn't say that that's evidence that it's not there.

Dawn Damon: Yes, it's so good. So let me ask, this is what you teach when you talk about your spiritual intelligence method. Are there steps to this method? Is this the first step to maybe a four-step process, or how does that work?

Donna Tashjian: Yes, this imagination is one of the very first steps in my life by design program, not by default is what it's called. Yes. Where I teach six superpowers we possess, imagination is one of them, and then 11 laws of the spirit. That we're probably not aware of or looking at them in a fresh way. And so learning to be able to see this.

So, it is a step-by-step process to begin to see differently. I'm putting on different glasses, and they don't feel like they fit. They feel funny. And I'm like, you know, the first time your prescription changes or you get the bifocal, you know, where there's two left and you're like, and you're a little off. It's like, I don't know how this feels. And so I walk people through because it isn't what we've been taught. Yes. It's counterintuitive. Even though in church we've been saying live by faith. No one tells us how. Yes. Really. And so, that's what God gave me. He's like, I am very practical. I give you handles on what faith is and how to walk it out so that you don't. So, yes, imagination is one of the first steps.

Dawn Damon: Yeah. And you and I are so very aligned in our podcasting and our coaching and our programs that we offer. I know for me, how I got there, it was through challenges and hardship and heartaches that I had to become brave and really decide if I was going to live by God's word and experience that new life, that metamorphosis that he talks about. How did you learn these things, these principles? Is there a story that American people would want to hear?

Donna Tashjian: When we were talking about recording this interview, and you said times that you've been brave in your life. So my eyes kind of rolled in my head a little bit. I'm like, which one do I talk about? I'm like, there's adversity of times in my life. When you have to be brave, and brave is exactly what we're talking about. It's believing that it's going to be different than what I've currently experienced or past experience.

Dawn Damon: It is.

Donna Tashjian: One of the biggest parts of being brave, I would think that one of the very first times I was brave is when I became a mom at 15. I would think that that would be probably the first time that I had to, you know, it wasn't a consensual situation, and I am in a religious family, and I was hid, I knew I was going to raise my child, it ended up being a beautiful little girl, but figuring out how, no idea how, and the thing that carried me through is at the age of 12, I had an encounter with God, now that's only 3 years earlier. If you're doing the math, and I was isolated and all I had was God, there was no social media, there was no connection. There was, you know, party line phones and things like that. So there were no friends, there were no connections, there was no support system other than God. And being brave and figuring out how to finish high school, how to get my own place, how to get a job, how to do all of those things because God's word was real for me because I would say every day, God, you promised your seed wouldn't beg for bread. I don't know how we're eating, but you promised to take care of us. I don't know how this is going to work out, but you said all things would work together for my good. And I practically learned.

So those roots that I developed in that time that I was brave, nobody can take that away from me. Would I ever want to go back and repeat it? Absolutely not.

Dawn Damon: No, absolutely not.

Donna Tashjian: I was terrified. I, nobody will ever love me. I am ruined. I am, you know, all of those things, all the lies. Yes. All the lies. And so learning that what God began to say, this is who I say you are. I'm like, but I can't see that. I don't feel I'm a teenager.

Dawn Damon: So was Mary when she had. Yes. Right.

Donna Tashjian: Yeah. So anyway, that was one of my very first brave moments.

Dawn Damon: Yeah. So you learned at a young age. Well, you learned the reality of Jesus. Sounds like you were probably raised in a home of faith. As you said, it was a religious upbringing. I'm really glad that you tapped into a relationship with Jesus and didn't just. Fall prey to the trappings of religion.

So many young people today will just end up bitter or angry about that. So you go on, you have your daughter, she's an amazing little girl, and all the things that life brought you were there other times. I know, you know, my audience is some midlife women here. You're doing a lot of things in midlife and beyond, so it's mostly our beyond. Did you have to be brave again and again in life?

Donna Tashjian: Well, yes, there were many times, but the other one that I thought I would share today is when I actually founded Vibrant Living.

Now, at the time, I am in menopause, or right before, so that tells you the age group. And you know all the things that are going on in our wonderful bodies during that specific time in our life. And now I have three adult kids, and I have seven grandchildren. And so it's a little bit different, but we were in a financial struggle time. We have our own company, which is a property management company we've had for over 20 years. I was also working full time as a realtor and market in the area was rough, those kinds of things. So it's totally self-employed. You know, there's no other income. So I took a part-time job. So I've got two full-time jobs and a part-time job now.

I took a part-time job at a nonprofit organization all the time. I'm doing pastoral care and meeting with people at church and all of that kind of stuff. So, I'm continuing to coach, but not calling it coaching per se. So all of that is still going on, too. As well as well. And so this nonprofit organization, I thought it would turn into whatever God had called me to do. I knew there was a call, but I just didn't know how to figure it out yet. I've done all these things. And you're like, it's not the thing, whatever the thing is. I don't know if people can relate to that. I know there's something, but I don't know what the thing is.

So, anyway, management turned toxic. They hired one person, and it changed the whole atmosphere. In the end, they said, we don't want you. I'm like, I can't be here anymore kind of thing. But I remember the day, it was March 31st here in Michigan. It was doing that sideways sleety rain, and it was going sideways. Then it matched my face as I walked out of there. I felt all of the stuff that came up for me all over again, that happened when I had gotten pregnant. I said, I wrote in my journal, and I'm embarrassed to say it out loud, but I wrote, I feel like a piece of trash. Somebody's left at the curb. Nobody wanted me. Nobody needs me. Nobody loves me. Yeah, and I just wanted to crawl in bed and make the world go away, but that's not me. It's not very long. But for two years, I prayed and sought God. I'm like, what am I supposed to do and trying to heal? Right. That experience was one of the longest it took me to forgive.

Dawn Damon: I want to interject just for a moment. I want to hear the rest of your story, but this is an area, a space where so many women in menopause or post menopause find themselves just not sure what the next chapter is in their life, feeling that they have more to contribute. They don't want to be invisible, but the world or circumstances like we've been talking about maybe point to them feeling irrelevant, or you've been downsized, you don't know technology, all the things. This is a very real space for women in this confusion. I'm lost. I don't know what to do now. Where do I go from here? So thank you for sharing that because that's a reality. So tell more.

Donna Tashjian: Yes, and figuring out, you feel like you're losing your mind. There's a whole lot of stuff that's in, that's going on at that. So, through that process, Vibrant Living was born. I call it following the breadcrumbs. There was just a little bit of nugget of this. I'm like, okay, God, I'll do that. Then there was one more step, and then I'm like, okay, I'll do that. It was a prophetic word that God gave me, and he called me vivacious.

Now I want to lay in bed. I'm crying. I'm lost. I'm feeling hopeless about all of the things that are going on. And he calls me vivacious, and I'm like. I don't even know what that word means; I had to look it up. I'm like, I don't know what you're trying to tell me, you know, kind of thing. And vibrant was one of the synonyms of vivacious, which is where vibrant living came from. And so I began to say, what is it you want me to do? Then, people said, Donna, you always have been a coach. I'm thinking of a football coach screaming at people, telling them to do laps. And I'm like, that's not who I am. And they said, no, it's a different kind of coach. And so I ended up going back to school to learn how to run a coaching practice or business, as opposed to doing it in a volunteer capacity for, at that point, 20 years.

Dawn Damon: Yes.

Donna Tashjian: And so it's a different ball of wax, if you will, when you learn how to do it and to even hone the skills better, learning NLP, how your brain works, all of, all of those kinds of things that I hadn't had that knowledge prior. So Vibrant Living was born, and I had to go back to school and, you know, the amount of the tuition was enough to choke me.

Dawn Damon: I bet.

Donna Tashjian: Yeah. I had lost a job. We were financially struggling. I'm like, how am I going to even do this? I don't even know if this will work. Remember, I'm feeling like a failure. I feel like nobody wants me. I'm like, I don't even know if anybody will do this and all the things. All the fears and doubts and all of them were rearing to the surface. I said, Deuteronomy. My husband and I prayed about it. He said, let's go for it. We'll figure it out. Because if this is the way God's leading you, there'll be provision.

Dawn Damon: Absolutely.

Donna Tashjian: So that was a time I had to be really brave because I'm doubting myself, but I know, I knew in my knower that there was something more. And so that was one of my brave moments.

Dawn Damon: Such a great story. I like that we can have two things happening at the same time, and both can be true.

Donna Tashjian: I can be really afraid, and I need courage. I need bravery, and I have to make that choice, that leap, Deuteronomy. I have to go for it.

I can also know at the same time, have this weird sense of peace that says, but I know I've heard from God. And so that's where we come full circle. I'm going to let my spirit lead all of my emotions. You're going to get on board. You know, I don't neglect that you're there, but I don't give you the power over me. So, Dawn, I can't believe our time is already slipping away from us.

Dawn Damon: This is so amazing. Throughout your life, you didn't let circumstances dictate your outcomes. You've made powerful choices. You've been a bravehearted woman. For a woman that's listening to us right now, as we close, what might you tell her if she's teetering on that ledge, if maybe she's without a job or in this space that we talk about what kind of advice or word of encouragement could you give her?

Donna Tashjian: Two things that I would like to share first is allow yourself the space to be in transition and that transition's not bad. We often label it as bad, as something's wrong with me or something's wrong. And so just allow it to be a growth place where you're on a treasure hunt, as opposed to lost. Yeah, just steer on a treasure hunt, and God will guide you. He's got you and all of those things. Just allow your spouse to walk through however long. I went back and said, I can't believe it was two years that I went through that process, but I was judgmental. About myself, which makes it even harder, so when you allow yourself the grace to say this is where I am and God has got me and this is part of my treasure hunt and I'm just going to see where he's got me. What's the surprises is because I begin to say God's got surprises for me and I'm going to look for them every day and begin to say that.

So, the other thing that was one of the best advice I ever got from one of my coaches is to get up every day and proceed as if success is inevitable.

Dawn Damon: Oh, that's so great. That's so powerful.

Donna Tashjian: And if you do that, the minute your eyes open, you look at your day as if success is inevitable. And when you do that, different things occur. It's almost as if it's magic, even though we don't particularly like that word- but it's miracles. It's like all of a sudden, you see things you didn't see before. Doors open that weren't there before. Or all of those things, because your faith is that it's going to be good. Yes. You pull different things from the unseen towards you than the things that we've had in the past. And so if you do those two things, if you're in the middle of someplace, be on a treasure hunt and just allow it to be, and get up every day and proceed as if success is inevitable.

Dawn Damon: Yes. Such great words, bravehearted women listening, you are on a treasure hunt, and your success is inevitable. So here's your step of action today. I want you to write that down. I am on a treasure hunt and my success. Is inevitable and believe that, claim that and speak that and watch it come to pass.

Donna, it has been so great to have you. You mentioned a course, and I think there might be some that are interested in connecting with you. What's the best way to do that?

Donna Tashjian: The easiest way is on my website. And that is ivibrantliving.com, there is a schedule tab. Just schedule a call with me and see if there are resources that I have available that could bless you, and in either wa,y we make a friend.

Dawn Damon: Beautiful. That's a free call bravehearts. So make that first free call, and all of those connections will be in the show notes. And I will leave you also as I do with my free gift for you. And you can do that by going to braveheartedwoman.com/resources. You know the thing, you know where it is, you'll find it.

Donna, so great to have you again today. I appreciate all of your comments, and I agree with what you're saying. So, bravehearts, this is your season. This is your time, time for you to find your brave and live your dreams!